For most people, the idea of taking their life is unfathomable. After all, aren't we taught to believe in ourselves and put our self-value above everything else. If only it were so easy, but many people are dying because they are born sick. A sickness that looks different than physical illness, but in actuality is a lot like it. With mental health being something we don't talk about enough, people suffer shame and they suffer alone in the dark. People get tired of wearing people out with the same problem over and over and they give up. Not only do they feel like a waste of space, but they also feel like a burden to others. With suicide, there can be illness, and there can also be the raging impulse of one incident setting someone off, someone who believes that one incident has changed their life from which they will not recover from. People can also repeat behaviour and simply cannot go through it again, knowing that people won't be so quick to forgive or understand. Not all suicides are mental health related, but it is hard to say they aren't because wouldn't you have to be very "not okay" in order to think about taking your own life. There are many reasons, related to suicide which affects people who suffer from mental health issues.
Mental Health is a Chronic Illness With No Real Cure
It's not easy to recover from a chronic health issue, which impacts people every day. Things go wrong, relationships get broken, jobs get lost, and people go broke. They become hopeless that their reality will never change. They see the same things happen over and happen again, and they lack control over how to solve things. They might know the way they wished things to go, but things get messed up, and people lose faith. It's hard to imagine a different reality when you've been living the same one over and over. How does anyone see change through so much chaos?
Symptoms of Mental Health Are Powerful
Symptoms of mental health are chronic and persistent. With Bipolar Depression, Clinical Depression, Depression, and BPD, the feelings of emptiness and sadness are strong. Impulses could run high in a Schizophrenic, Manic or BPD patient, and sometimes suicides are a direct result of the mental health that is persisting, which could be anything from delusional thoughts to compulsions. For example, patients can become fixated upon dying and think of ways to go, or they might be haunted by a thought that tells them it's the best solution. You tell yourself that it is the only answer, the only way to make everything okay and it's hard to back away from the option because you think the world would be better off without you.
Your Illness Causes Issues In Your Life and You Think You are Better Off Dead
People grow tired of your constantly negative ways. It becomes work just to see you in a good mood. People stop coming around as much or flat out tell you they don't want to see you anymore. People block and delete you on social media, making you feel punished for being sick. You know people don't want anything to happen to you, but they also don't know how to be there anymore. You become a broken record, and your suicide threats become less scary to those around you. Suddenly, you are the boy who cried wolf, but you're not crying, these feelings and thoughts are real, and you've attempted suicide, but you've survived and a part of you is just looking for the proper means. A part of you thinks everyone cares, but that everyone would be better off without your annoying existence.
You Could Lose Something You Want Back
Sometimes mental health issues interfere with work and interpersonal relationships. You could get to the point where you've lost too much, as a result of your sickness, and you cannot continue, knowing how misunderstood you are at work with a friend. Knowing that you have publicly embarrassed yourself and created a reputation that bleeds victim, you just want to vanish. Sometimes this weight we put on people and things, and the ability to make things work is huge. We feel as though we can never be normal, and that we will lose or turn off everything and everyone who is important to us.
Your Illness Makes You Feel Trapped With Nowhere To Go
You want to tell people about the severity of what you go through, but it's not an easy thing to talk about. You feel trapped like you've lived this horrible reality, but have no safe place to share it. People try to be accepting, but they still judge and these types of things can be deal-breakers for some people. You think that the world will always see you as sick and therefore you will always be limited by what you can do in the world, and it makes you not want to exist. You don't know where to go, except creep in the shadows, relying on social media sites for a peak of reality, which isn't even reality.
The Media Show How Mental Health is Taking Lives
With the recent death of Chris Cornell, and previous deaths like Robin Williams, Kurt Cobain, Amy Winehouse, Brittany Murphy, Whitney Houston, Heath Ledger, Johnathan Brandis, Marilyn Monroe, Sylvia Plath, Virginia Wolf, Jimmy Hendrix, and so many others. Often the cause of death can't be determined, but abusing drugs and alcohol is a slow suicide, and all of these people were sick. They didn't use their celebrity platform to talk about their illness, instead, they let the illness win. A large part of this has to do with the shame associated with coming out with a mental illness and speaks largely to the rich and wealthy people who are sick in private. Capable of surviving financially, the issues get lost in the glamor.
Even If You Manage It, You Will Always Be Sick
For a woman, there is a chance that she will pass on mental illness to her baby. She won't be able to breastfeed because the medication she has to go back on will be in the milk and will be bad for the baby. This thing you have, or some cases, the things you have are biological, they aren't going anywhere. If you were to fall in love with another sick person there is a high 60% chance that your child will be born with mental illness. It seems like there is no escaping it. You are infected, it is in your brain and in your blood and you can pass it down. It makes you think that you won't be able to do things, like raise a family because you will be too busy taking care of yourself, and then your just that bad mom who did wild things with her children and gave them bad memories. There is no cure. There is medicine to help balance things out, but it doesn't go away. BPD can go away with DBT Skills, but it can come back. It's a lot of work and a lot of sacrifices, and it's not easy.
People Will Never Understand
Even if they tell you that they have a Bipolar sister or a Schizophrenic uncle, people can't understand what they don't go through. People will hear your words and witness your actions and hold you accountable, no matter what state you are in. People will assume that even if you were sick, they can't trust you, and people will throw up an arm's length between them and you. Some people might just ignore you entirely because they find you to be too much, or too critical or too negative. You're the person who is never happy and always has a problem and who always says the wrong thing. People grow tired of this person fast. Social norms exist for a reason and when you act "weird" or make yourself stand out in a negative way, people are likely to push back. It's not common that they will consider your health issues just that you are being a disturbance of some kind.
Suicide Becomes a Permeate Solution to a Permeate Problem
Guidance counsellors are always telling you that suicide is a permanent problem to a temporary solution, but for people who are sick, it's a permeate solution to a permeate problem. They've suffered, and they've suffered alone and for long periods of time, and they know it's here to stay. Suicide will stop the symptoms. People who experience mental health might need to escape themselves. Being inside in their own body and their own skin doesn't feel right, and it doesn't feel right to be alive--they simply can't see life through the same lens as others. There can also be a lack of connection to their environment. Patients may hate where they live and feel the need to hide from others because they have bad interactions with them. Like any illness that causes a lot of pain, people want out of it, they want to stop the suffering, and they know that it will not continue. Even if it gets better, there will always be bumps along the way. They can't explain how hard it is, but anyone who wants to take their life with mental health has truly endured a lot of pain. The pain likely has added up over the years, and with every passing year, it builds up to more and more to the point where a person can't take it.
Most People Think That Suicide is Selfish
Nobody wants to inflict pain upon on the people that they love, and suicides are terrible because people always think they could have done something to prevent it. People are angry with those who want to kill themselves, but do those people want their loved ones to suffer? Should they stay alive for others only to live in pain? This is of course after trying many different forms of treatment and still coming out miserable. Suicide is not a solution, but some people think it is, and at least these people do become free of their pain. Pain that no one could help. Perhaps suicide was their last option because not everyone is happy here, not everyone is good at life, and not everyone wants to be here. Should people be influenced to stay here against their will? Yes, we will miss them dearly, but if it's what they truly want, you have to respect that they feel like they've done the best they can, and living with an illness or illnesses is not longer an option.
Suicide Prevention Can Make a Difference
People don't realize how many people would try to help if they knew you wanted to end your life. Talk about your feelings. Try to reach out before you do anything harmful to yourself, you'd be surprised how much a good talk can help. If you don't want to bother people in your life, you can share your feelings on social media or call a crisis line. You will be amazed at the response you will get from people because no wants you to die. Let whoever you are communicating with know that you are just feeling this way, need to talk, and don't need them to call the police (unless you have a plan in mind, in which case you need to be honest about it). The police actually know nothing about mental health. They likely will just put you in handcuffs, throw you in an Ambulance and take you to a hospital to see a trained Psychiatrist. It is possible for people to be effective and reach the person in need. Sometimes they are just having a really bad day and need a little reassurance. Regardless, if you are really worried, and you know, hear or see that person calming down, contact their family or close friends first.
In no shape or form am I condoning suicide, I do not think it is a solution. I am shedding awareness as to why people who suffer from mental health issues get in that mind frame. It's a scary place to be, but it's a reality. Mental health is taking lives, and we need to acknowledge how we can be a better help to the people in our life who suffer. Try to recognize when something of concern is going on, and look past someone's emotional fury. People need help, but they don't always know how to ask for it. Committing suicide means, that person needed help, but they didn't feel like they could get it. We have to somehow make it possible for people to believe that there is help for them and that while things take time, they can turn around. There are no sugarcoats about it, regardless the circumstances, it's not going to be easy.